Into the marvelous light I come…
A testimony to YISS 2006
by Koh Hsing Dee
My experience at YISS 2006 could be likened to that of a trial in court. God was the defendant, and I was the prosecutor. I had put Him on trial for His apparent absence in my life, and the Spirit, his lawyer, laid forth the evidence in His defense.
The events of the two nights of praying over and outpouring of the Spirit were in the category of empowerment that has the potential to be life-changing. It all began with the sacrament of reconciliation. I confessed to something that I had been denying myself to all along, and when the priest started to pray over me, I felt this warmth envelope my head even though his hand was not even touching me. That led me to wonder if there was something more to be expected for the night.
I had already received the gift of tongues from the previous LISS, but due to lack of practice it remained at a very elementary stage. I decided to be ambitious and ask God for new tongues, for my utterances to develop into something more enriching. Within minutes of praying in tongues I felt this discernibly strange and new clicking sound my tongue was making, which felt like…whoa…
There was more to come. Before I went for the camp I had presented at a Choice weekend, and in the process I felt that some healing had taken place, that God had by His good grace set me free from a huge burden. But I was uncertain and fearful that my old hurts would return to haunt me, so I asked for permanent healing of the wounds in my family, and to be freed from my own selfishness and pride. I also asked for a sign of His love. I needed something tangible to strengthen my resolve. Around me people were beginning to rest in the Spirit, falling backwards, crying, shaking. I had always thought that all those dramatic events would never happen to me. I thought I just was not the sort, whatever that meant. Well before long the prayer intercessor was in front of me, holding my hands and asking for my request. I closed my eyes, felt this heavy sensation pressing down on me, swayed a little and fell backwards. I had not heard a word the intercessor said. With my eyes closed I felt…nothing. A nothingness that could only mean complete peace.
By the third and final night I was beginning to think that this was already the best that could possibly happen. But as they say, our God is a God of surprises, so even though I did not get any physical sensation of the presence of the Spirit, a greater gift was bestowed upon me. I made so much advancement in my tongues that my intercessor was quite impressed and told me to keep it up.
In the midst of receiving all these graces I had one tiny regret. During the second night when the invitation was made for testimonies, a part of me was enthusiastically leaping forward, but a larger part of me restrained myself from declaring His love. It became a little regret gnawing away at me, but I was determined to remain quiet, thinking that the chance had already passed me by. On that final night the worship leader gave the usual invite for testimonies once everyone had settled down. I averted my gaze from him, thinking, “Whatever, I’ve got nothing to say.” He looked straight at me and said, “The girl in red.” I was wearing my trademark red sweater then. I stood and went forward, rattling off my story just as I had wanted to.
In my closing statement, I, the prosecutor, have been rendered speechless. God has presented me with overwhelming evidence of His love. My doubts and fears have been overcome by His mighty acts of love. And so, I rest my case.
by Koh Hsing Dee
My experience at YISS 2006 could be likened to that of a trial in court. God was the defendant, and I was the prosecutor. I had put Him on trial for His apparent absence in my life, and the Spirit, his lawyer, laid forth the evidence in His defense.
The events of the two nights of praying over and outpouring of the Spirit were in the category of empowerment that has the potential to be life-changing. It all began with the sacrament of reconciliation. I confessed to something that I had been denying myself to all along, and when the priest started to pray over me, I felt this warmth envelope my head even though his hand was not even touching me. That led me to wonder if there was something more to be expected for the night.
I had already received the gift of tongues from the previous LISS, but due to lack of practice it remained at a very elementary stage. I decided to be ambitious and ask God for new tongues, for my utterances to develop into something more enriching. Within minutes of praying in tongues I felt this discernibly strange and new clicking sound my tongue was making, which felt like…whoa…
There was more to come. Before I went for the camp I had presented at a Choice weekend, and in the process I felt that some healing had taken place, that God had by His good grace set me free from a huge burden. But I was uncertain and fearful that my old hurts would return to haunt me, so I asked for permanent healing of the wounds in my family, and to be freed from my own selfishness and pride. I also asked for a sign of His love. I needed something tangible to strengthen my resolve. Around me people were beginning to rest in the Spirit, falling backwards, crying, shaking. I had always thought that all those dramatic events would never happen to me. I thought I just was not the sort, whatever that meant. Well before long the prayer intercessor was in front of me, holding my hands and asking for my request. I closed my eyes, felt this heavy sensation pressing down on me, swayed a little and fell backwards. I had not heard a word the intercessor said. With my eyes closed I felt…nothing. A nothingness that could only mean complete peace.
By the third and final night I was beginning to think that this was already the best that could possibly happen. But as they say, our God is a God of surprises, so even though I did not get any physical sensation of the presence of the Spirit, a greater gift was bestowed upon me. I made so much advancement in my tongues that my intercessor was quite impressed and told me to keep it up.
In the midst of receiving all these graces I had one tiny regret. During the second night when the invitation was made for testimonies, a part of me was enthusiastically leaping forward, but a larger part of me restrained myself from declaring His love. It became a little regret gnawing away at me, but I was determined to remain quiet, thinking that the chance had already passed me by. On that final night the worship leader gave the usual invite for testimonies once everyone had settled down. I averted my gaze from him, thinking, “Whatever, I’ve got nothing to say.” He looked straight at me and said, “The girl in red.” I was wearing my trademark red sweater then. I stood and went forward, rattling off my story just as I had wanted to.
In my closing statement, I, the prosecutor, have been rendered speechless. God has presented me with overwhelming evidence of His love. My doubts and fears have been overcome by His mighty acts of love. And so, I rest my case.
posted by Amplifier at 1:21 AM
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